Snark and Stage Fright
Release Date: 03/10/15
Swoon Romance
Summary from Goodreads:
Happily-ever-after isn’t as happy or forever as Jane Austen makes it
look. Just something Georgia Barrett learns when her sharp tongue costs her the
only guy she’s ever really cared about: Michael Endicott.
Determined to move on, Georgia lands the lead role in the school’s fall
musical. But to survive on stage, she’ll need to learn to express herself
without her protective shield of snark. She soon discovers being honest with
others means being honest with herself, and the truth is she’s still in love
with Michael.
But from the looks of Michael’s new girlfriend, Georgia isn’t the only
one who tried to move on. Apparently, some people are just better at it than
others. And when Michael and his girlfriend join the cast of the fall musical,
Georgia finds out that snark and stage fright are the least of her worries…
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Excerpt:
We heard Michael’s mom calling from the
house, “Michael, phone for you!” and he said, “Well, Georgia and I should get
back to the house before we miss lunch … ”
“But I just got here!” Catalina pouted for
a second, then said, “Why don’t you go take your call and grab something from
the kitchen to bring back so we can catch up? It’ll give me a chance to get to
know Georgia—and tell her all your dirty secrets.”
Michael looked at me uncertainly, then back
at the house, then back to me. I nodded, albeit reluctantly, so he got up and
started walking away. I wanted to stay on that beach blanket and dish with
Catalina about as much as I wanted a Sharknado to shoot onto the beach and bite
off one of my limbs. At least I’d have a story to tell Cassie later, one that
she would actually want to listen to—my afternoon in the sand with my
boyfriend’s supermodel summer beach house bestie.
Catalina stretched her impossibly long and tanned legs in
front of her and cooed,
“So you and Michael are going out? He makes
an excellent boyfriend, doesn’t he? He’s a little stiff at first, but once you
loosen him up … ”
I could taste my breakfast in my throat
when she said that.
“Michael and I have had a little thing
going every summer since I was about fourteen, I guess,” she explained, then
gave a sharp little laugh, “Guess not this year!”
“Guess not.”
She looked at me, all of me, up and down
and back again, as if trying to figure out how she’d lost out on her yearly
fling to a troll like me. But as uncomfortable as she was making me, I was
determined to hold my tongue rather than upset any more of Michael’s family,
friends, and assembled guests, lest they send me back over the Bourne Bridge to
the mainland—leaving Michael here with Catalina.
“So you and Michael … ?” Her question
trailed off; it was too ridiculous to ask.
I nodded and said, “Me and Michael.”
“Wow. I mean, I’m sorry, but … Just—wow.
It’s a surprise, that’s all.”
I should have held my tongue. Manually.
With both hands. But I just couldn’t.
Before I could stop myself, I said, “Well,
it’s part of his community service.”
Her sandy brows drew together over her
lowered sunglasses and she looked at me.
“Really?” She drew out the word so that it
had about eighteen syllables.
“Yeah. Michael got arrested for passing bad
checks. But he was just sentenced to community service since his family knows
the judge and all. So he has to take orphan girls with no hope of modelling
careers down to the Cape once or twice a summer. And I’m this week’s lucky
orphan!”
After a few seconds, she snarled, “Michael
would never pass bad checks,” and eyed me with great indignation.
“That was the part of the story you found
unbelievable? Not the orphanage for failed models?” I laughed.
“I’m finding this whole situation pretty
unbelievable, to tell you the truth.” She shook her head. Don’t you find it an
eensy weensy bit surprising yourself?” she asked me and then sat there with two
fingers poised like pincers a few millimeters apart to indicate the “eensy
weensy-ness” of my chances of being with Michael.
“What’s that, Catalina? Your cup size
before the surgery?” I blurted out—just as Michael showed up.
“Everything okay here?” he asked after he
dropped a cloth shopping bag filled with some crusty bread, cheese, and a bunch
of big green grapes onto the towel.
I waited for Catalina to burst into wounded
tears. But she chirped, “Georgia is sooo funny,” as if we had just been
laughing and braiding each other’s hair in one of history’s finest moments of
girl bonding.
Interesting ploy.
Stephanie Wardrop grew
up in Reading, Pennsylvania, a town mostly famous for being a railroad card in
Monopoly. After giving up on her childhood goal of becoming a pirate, she
decided to become a writer but took a detour through lots of college and grad
school and ended up teaching writing and British and American literature. She's
the author of the Swoon Romance e-novella series Snark and Circumstance, based
on Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, and lives in western New England with her
husband, kids, cats, and gecko.
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